What Leaders Actually Crave (And Rarely Admit)

A vulnerable truth about paradox, power, and why my launches keep failing.
Something’s shifting in leadership—I think I know what it is.

Years ago, I found a quote I keep returning to: “She is a paradox. Faithful yet detached. Committed yet relaxed. Predictable in her unpredictability.”

I’ve lived that paradox—strategic yet intuitive, confident yet uncertain, offering transformation while still becoming.

While exploring othered futurism and queer time, I realised I am the paradox I study.

My launches show polished programmes often kill real transformation.

From your DMs, I hear you crave what I’m learning—holding multiple truths:
Fierce and tender. Strategic and intuitive. Successful and still becoming.
You’ve outgrown leadership models that treat consciousness as a luxury.
You’re navigating tensions—scaling tech with integrity, craving authenticity in performance-driven systems. You’re tired of experts pretending they have it all figured out.

What you’re really saying:

“We see you.” Your complexity builds trust.
“We want real voices.” People walking this path.
“We have choices.” Who we trust matters.

The Truth About My Work

Every time I try to tidy it up, I lose the power—the messiness of real transformation.

That’s also why the work that’s felt most alive hasn’t come from polished packages, but from real, relational spaces—like the ones I’ve built with Stonewall, UK Black Pride, and now NYX Professional Makeup as part of their Proudly Pro-You cause, celebrating queer, trans and intersex people of colour (QTIPOC).

https://www.stonewall.org.uk/resources/proudly-pro-you-series

It’s in these kinds of collaborations—where truth becomes strategy—that I’ve seen the most profound shifts.

Like when Marty Davies 🏳️‍⚧️ (writer, artist, founder of Trans+ History Week) said: “Adah’s presence as a coach—and a kind of wisdom council—helped me unlock belief in myself. Her tools and models made the shift feel not just possible, but energising.”

Uncertainty isn’t a flaw—it’s what allows your authentic emergence.

What I’m Building Instead:
→ Threshold — a space to practise authority and vulnerability together
→ Power, Paradoxes & Presence — conversations on tech, truth, and becoming

These aren’t polished products. They’re living containers—for those ready to explore leadership from the inside out.

If you're curious, say CURIOUS. I’ll share more.

No perfect launches. No polished promises. Just real transformation, in real time.

Sometimes the most powerful thing we can do is admit: We’re still becoming what we help others become.